Monday, January 26, 2015

Grieving Daddy on Facebook

     Recently,  two good friends of mine lost the fathers.  Angela Braach lost her sweet Daddy on November 23, 2014 and Katie Taylor lost her dear ole dad on December 2, 2014.  As I've watched and prayed  for for my friends and their families,  I've been taken aback 9 years to when my Daddy died on July 10, 2006.
    My daddy was sick for about 16 years with kidney issues.  I went to bed many nights just knowing that I would get a phone call before the sun rise; telling me that he didn't make it.   He was on Dialysis for the better part of those years - 3 or 4 days a week.
     I wish I could say that my daddy and I were always close and that I was always there for him.  Our life, our family's life, was quite complicated.  I spent years being angry at my daddy.  He made some choices in his life that I felt devastated from.  They were choices that not only hurt me as a daughter, but also as a Christian.  It is hard for a daughter to see her father sin and make mistakes.  I knew my daddy loved me and he knew I loved him, but there were things that I couldn't get past, & know I'm kicking myself now because all that did was wasted precious time that I could have spent with my Daddy.  Time that I can never get back.
     As hard as it is for a daughter to realize her daddy made mistake; it's even harder to think of her daddy not being in Heaven waiting for her.  I can remember a couple of Christmases before he died talking to him; pleading for him to turn to God and seek forgiveness.  He said no, that he had committed the unforgivable sin and had grieved the Holy Spirit.  It was then that I began to reverently pray that he  would turn  back to God.  I was so relived and rejoiced when Lisa told me at the funeral that two night before he died he asked for forgiveness and accepted Christ.
     God and time has a way of healing a broken heart.  Although I still greatly miss my daddy, I can now look back  on his life, and on our life as father and daughter,  and can truly see God's love and work and can say that I know and believed my daddy in walking in the presence of God.
     While I'm unaware of the struggles that my friends Angela and Katie had with their on fathers, it is my prayer that they can look pass them, they they can see their father truly for who God truly made him to be.  They are grieving now, but I pray that will wake up one day and  the sadness will be replaced with only sweet memories.  I love you both dearly and you are both in my prayers.

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