Happy New Years

As I start this, it is 11:39, on Dec 31, 2010.  We're sitting in the sun room, watching cheesy late night,  wait on the new year to roll around.  It's funny, Barrett and I stay up past midnight every night, but I honestly could've gone to bed at 9:00.  LOL!  We have had a very low key day and I LOVED IT!!!  Had pizzas, watched movie, played WII ~Donky Kong and have just chilled.  I've been playing with my new BFF ~ my "Anti-Kid" laptop.  I discovered 2 great web sites.  www.cozi.com  and another one which I'll to post later, but it was a site that lets you read the bible in a year.  I'm excited about the site. And the Cozi site is a free online calendar and organizer  It coordinated my calendar with the kids' school calendar.  It allows to use color to coordinate everyone.    I really want to get organize this year, I know I'm constantly saying this.  My Mama always said that what you do on Jan 1, you do all year.  So, my plan is to spend the day cleaning, doing laundry, loving my family and writing

What would I tell a 16 year old version of myself

So, Midday Connection asked the question the other day on the radio:  What would you say to a 16 year old you?  Now that's I loaded question if there ever was one  I turned 16 on November 29,  1989.  Two very determining factors that would alter my life forever happened within two weeks of my sixteenth birthday.  First, my Daddy was in a horrific accident that  nearly killed him.  He was hunting in Sherwood and feel out of a tree stand.  I'm ashamed to say I don't remember a lot  about the accident.  I honestly don't know if I have just blocked it out of my memory, or if I was just a selfish girl at heart who thought of nothing or no one but herself.  Sadly and with deep regret, I fear it was the latter one.
     The other thing that happen was I attended a retreat called SEARCH where I fell totally in love with God.  I had been a Christian.  My family had started going to church when I was 7.  I always loved church and God,  but that weekend at SEARCH was when I started to understand that God loved me and wanted a personal relationship with me.  I wasn't suppose to be at SEARCH that weekend.  It was reserved for Juniors  and Seniors i n high school.  Even though I was sixteen, I was a lowly freshmen - I have a late birthday, plus I went to a preschool for disabled students until 7 and my parent wanted me to go into to the first grade   Needless to say, I'm older than many of my friends.  But it never fails to amaze me how God's way are greater than my ways; And He always knows exactly what we need exactly when we need it.  I can't tell you anything specific that happen that weekend that changed my life  It was what the future would bring that would change my life.  God used a weekend retreat to strengthen my life forever.
     My Daddy was never quite the same after the accident.  I really think he suffer brain damage,  He changed.  It is not my desire to bash my Daddy here.   I loved him.  He made some choices, that I prayer I'll never make, but I respect his choices because I do  believe that they were part of the path of his life.    Some of the choices he made impaired the rest of the family.  It was through what I learned through SEARCH that allowed me to survive that difficult change in my life.  I had to learn to be depend on God, no matter what!
     That seams like such a long time ago.  I guess if I could anything to that young girl now it would be to hold on to faith and to love the peopled around you, especially your daddy.  I loved my daddy, always did and always will.  I spent many years angry at  him and withdrawn from him.  I felt the need, regrettable to keep my children from him.  I thought, and still do in some part believe, that I was acting in the best interest of my children.  I've always struggled with this decision and always will.  I pray that God and my Daddy forgive me. We lost Daddy five and a half years ago, and although I made amends with him a few days before he died, I can not get back the time I lost with him.

New Lap

A - Z SURVEY

A - Animal
dog

B - Best Friend
Jeanne

C - Crush
Barrett

D - Dad's Name
Jim

E - Easiest Person To Talk To
Michelle

F - Favorite Band
Eagles

G - Gummy Bears Or Worms
Bears

H - Hometown
Nashville

I - Instrument
piano

J - Job
mommy/wife

K - Kids
2

L - Longest Car Ride
to Arizona

M - Milk Flavor
Chacolae

N - Number Of Siblings
7

O - One Wish
for peace

P - Phobias
being burried alive

Q - Favorite Quote
"every time a bell rings, an angel gets it's wings" - It's A Wonderful Life

R - Reason To Smile
MY FAMILY

S - Song You Last Heard
???

T - Time You Woke Up
12

U - Unknown Fact About Me
???

V - Vegetable
carrot

W - Worst Habits
???
 
X - X-Rays You've Had
hip,hand, finger, heard, foot, stoamc`

Y - Your Favorite Food
pizza

Z - Zodiac Sign
Sag.

No Broken Bones

      So, today as I was sitting in the truck while the kids and Barrett went in Shoe Carnival, I took out my bible and turned to Psalm.  I ran across PS. 34: 19-21 which says; 

      "The righteous person may have many troubles,
   but the LORD delivers him from them all;
²⁰ he protects all his bones,
   not one of them will be broken.

 ²¹ Evil will slay the wicked;
   the foes of the righteous will be condemned."

     

     I was in total awe when I read this; especially verse 20!  Out of all my years of walking (and falling)  I've never broken a bone.  I did crack my pinkie finger when I was a kid.  I've had to get stitches  a couple of time; I still get dizzy at times from my infamous concussion last year; and I have many scares and bruises that decorate my body buy no broken bones to claim.  This is truly a miracle.  When I read this passage it just truly made me think; "Man God is so good!"  He Has protected me from physically injuries many, many times, And He's protected more times than against all the spiritual blunders I've had.  I know that I could fall tonight and seriously  hurt myself tonight, it wouldn't mean that I'm in any less way protected by God.  If He see fit to let me have a broken bone He'll give me what I'll need to deal with it, just as he allowed Jesus to die for the forgiveness of my sins so that I could live with him in Heaven.  This concept of no broken bones is quite interesting  because Jesus at the time of the crucifixion  which fulfills phropecy.  

Jn 19:31-37 tells us 

"Now it was the day of Preparation, and the next day was to be a special Sabbath. Because the Jewish leaders did not want the bodies left on the crosses during the Sabbath, they asked Pilate to have the legs broken and the bodies taken down. 32 The soldiers therefore came and broke the legs of the first man who had been crucified with Jesus, and then those of the other. 33 But when they came to Jesus and found that he was already dead, they did not break his legs. 34 Instead, one of the soldiers pierced Jesus’ side with a spear, bringing a sudden flow of blood and water. 35 The man who saw it has given testimony, and his testimony is true. He knows that he tells the truth, and he testifies so that you also may believe. 36 These things happened so that the scripture would be fulfilled: “Not one of his bones will be broken,”[a] 37 and, as another scripture says, “They will look on the one they have pierced.”[b]

   A biblical sacrifice had to be presented with out any blemishes  Leviticus 1:3 says:

 ³ “‘If the offering is a burnt offering from the herd, you are to offer a male without defect. You must present it at the entrance to the tent of meeting so that it will be acceptable to the LORD."

Not only Has God always protected my bones, He first protected Christ's bones so that He would remain the prefect, unblemished sacrifice for my sin.

 

My Hero- My Behind the Scenes Mama

     If  you had asked me growing up who my biggest supporter was I would have said my Daddy.  My Daddy was a great daddy!  He was the more vocal voice.  When I was born they basically told my parents to go home, leave me at the hospital and forget they every  had a daughter.  I wasn't expected to live, and even if I did live I was expected to be a vegetable and have all sorts of health issues; including mental retardation.  My Daddy told them ; No, that I was going to live and that I was going to have a "normal" life.  My parents both fought for me, but I guess I remember Daddy being my "vocal" about.it.  My Daddy had a very strong and domineering personality about him; the kind that simply demanded respect.  My Mama was/is more of a behind the scenes type of person.  Looking back I can say it was Mama who was the true super hero in my life:  She took me to all my doctors and speech appointments.  She's the one who helped me do leg exercises every night.  It was Mama who drove me back and forth to school for ten years just so I could go to one of the best schools in Nashville in order to receive a good education.  I loved my mom, but I didn't give her the respect she deserved.  I was jealous of her:.  She was "normal" and "perfect" and I would never be.  I blamed her for my disability.  I had came out of her body.  I expected her to always take care of me, according to my standards which were set way to high.  She was a stay-at-home-mom and I just thought that was so uncool.  All my friends' mom worked and I saw them as what  I wanted to be.  When she started nursing school my freshmen year of high school, I was elated. I seriously thought she wanted a career beyond being a wife and mother, she didn't.  She was doing what she had to in order to take care of her family.
      I've learned so much about my mom by becoming a mom.  I can still hear her saying, "I hope  you have a kid just like you!"  I see myself in Dalton constantly, especially as we tread through these preteen years. Bobbye Sue however, is just like.  I sometimes wonder if God placed me in the middle of those three simply for his own amusement.  Mama has taught me many things; to be patient, to love unconditionally; to forgive willing and to always follow.  Mama and I are very different people in many ways.  She's gone through things that I can't even fathom.  She's a lot stronger person than I though she was.  Like I said earlier she was/is a very behind the scenes person.  And now as I'm a wife and a mother that what I want to be.  This is very biblical.  No one on earth loved Jesus more than Mary did, however she too was very much a behind the scenes person.  She was there when He needed her; to support, but she knew that much of Jesus' life was going to a solo journey.  As I think about the relationship I have with my kids and reflect on the relationship I have with Mama, I think of John 3:30 where John the Baptist tells his disciples; "He must increase, but I must decrees."  (HCSB)  We have to let our kids grow up and be who God wants them to be.  My mom gave me everything she and then some in order to take care of me;  She did it willing and without expectation in return.  I'm sure in many ways, her and my family's could have been less complicated had they chosen to deal with my disability, but they chose to take the high road and do what was best for me.  As a Mama, I too am called to prepare my kids and then step back and watch them  soar.  This can be difficult in so many ways: First, it's natural to worry about them. and then I think; "Well, that's not how I would have done it; how I told them them to do it!"  Self keeps reaping back  in, trying to steel the spotlight and it isn't even my scene!   How can I expect them to live a good and godly life when I am constantly trying to run in and still the glory  I am proud to confess that when I grow up I want to be just like my Mama.  She's strong, kind, loving...I don't know if I'll make it but that's my aim.

This One Thing I Do"

Ch 5 in  Becoming a Woman Of Simplicity

This lesson was very timely for me. I needed that boost to get my mind back on the ONE THING that I should be focused on at all times. Are you focused on the One Thing?

Colossians 1:9-10 tells us that to know God is to Walk worthy of the Lord, to please Him, to bear fruit in good works, and to grow in my knowledge of Him.

In what ways were Martha and Mary different? In my mind, Marthe must be the “BIG” sister. She's the one who's been told by their mother to make sure the house, that everyone has enough to eat and everything they need. Mary must be the “LITTLE” sister. She was told to help the “BIG” sister, but soon became bored and wandered off to spy on the stranger in the living room. (LOL1, You can't tell I'm a “BIG” sister!?!?)

Would you be in the kitchen with Martha or would you be sitting with Mary? I'd probably be sitting with Mary, although feeling guilty because I wasn't helping Martha. I'd be wondering “Does Jesus think I'm a awful person because I'm not helping my “BIG” sister? But I want to be with Him.” Yeah, I constantly have thought wars with myself!
Do you spend undistracted time alone with Jesus? I try, at times I do better than others

Define the word, abide. To “live” in

According to 1 Corinthians 9:24-27, how can you improve the way you are running the race? I am to run to win. I have to discipline myself thru prayer, study, and nurturing my relationship with God in order to be properly trained,
Discuss the quote in the book by Tozer, and how you think it might apply to you, which said, "Yet for all God's good will toward us, He is unable to grant us our heat's desires till all our desires have been reduced to one.'' We can't not truly receive ate the blessing that God has in store for us until we make Him our #1 priority.

Talk about any other ideas and understandings you gained from this chapter. I think through this chapter that I really have to stay close to god and live in Him. Usually when my life gets chaotic and out or control, I can ALWAYS look and see that I've let my relationship with God slide and I'm not as close to Him as I need to be.